Lady and the Tramp
by Vietta
Summary: Eliza Shinra was nearly abducted by an anti-Shinra faction and now, to make her life worse, her brother Rufus is having Reno be her body guard. Will they learn to get along or spend the next few weeks at each other's throats?
1. Chapter 1

Snow fell on the thin blonde strands of hair trailing out from under Eliza's hat as she knocked the same powdery substance off of her boots. She unlocked the huge heavy oak doors keeping her from warmth and pushed them open irritably, her footsteps echoing in the huge hall of the grand and empty mansion. Eliza Shinra quickly shed her coat and mittens, all of her winter gear thrown carelessly to the floor for one of the many staff members to clean up later. She had spent most of her life being coddled by the overpaid staff members and she had no desire for that to change as she wandered through the halls of the grand mansion. Her father had rarely set foot in the cavernous place while she was growing up and Rufus was always busy with the power company and even when he did have time to waste he usually spent it in the company of his Turks instead of his step-sister. By all accounts Eliza should've been angry at both of them for leaving her alone all the time, she had every right to be mad at them for that, but she wasn't. She hardly talked to either of them and so long as they didn't cut her funds she was perfectly fine being left to find her own entertainment. As a child she had tried to make her father angry by spending more than he had given her, but her cry for attention had backfired as it had simply ended up with her getting more money put in her bank account each month. The extra money was like a pat on the head for being spoiled and since she saw that she was rewarded for buying whatever caught her fancy she created a very bad habit for impulse shopping, buying things she had no use for or no care to use. Lately nothing of any true value had been catching her eye, hence her irritation upon opening the door. She was craving something to take her mind off the loneliness that pressed in on her with every echoing step she took in the lavish mansion and everything she had bored her immensely, most of the items things that were supposed to be enjoyed by more than one person. It didn't matter how many billiard balls she could sink in a single shot or how many flips she could fit into a dive, if no one was around to watch her it didn't matter. Eliza didn't consciously realize this of course, her main concern being the fact that she was ridiculously bored and sick of shopping. She had spent the past few years of her life shopping alone or with one of the simpering 'friends' Rufus occasionally paid for to keep her company and she had nearly everything a woman could ever want to spend money on, hence her problem finding entertainment. The only thing that had been able to grab her attention that day was a book, a small leather-bound tome with the words Loveless stamped in gold leaf on the edge.

Eliza Shinra was not an idiot, no matter how much the papers wanted to depict her as just another rich blonde bimbo incapable of comprehending anything worth knowing. The Shinra mansion had quite the impressive library and Eliza had spent countless hours sitting and reading inside it, sometimes not emerging for days because the housekeepers would bring her food and drink at the ring of a bell and a bathroom was attached to the enormous room. She was sure there was a copy of Loveless somewhere in the library, but since she didn't feel like searching through the despairingly long rows of thick, unorganized books she had bought another copy, knowing that no one would ever notice or care about the presence of a second Loveless.

Eliza gave a rare smile as she walked into the library, noting with genuine happiness that one of the many housekeepers had lit a fire in the grate before going to bed. It was custom for the staff who resided in the home to retire by a certain hour and Eliza had arrived home long after they were to have gone to bed. She curled up in the chair nearest the fireplace, her body greedily soaking up the warm glow that chased the frigid Midgar winter from her pallid skin. She opened her book and began reading, her bright green eyes hardly concentrating on the words floating before them.

Eliza always thought of her brother when she read for some reason, his smug face popping up in her mind's eye whenever she cracked open a book. She hated Rufus, but only because she envied him. He was heir to the most powerful company in the world and he was just as pompous and condescending as Eliza remembered her father to be on the few occasions where he had actually talked to her. Eliza couldn't understand why their father had always loved Rufus more, her step-brother always seeming to get more even when they were supposed to have an equal share.

Eliza's brooding thoughts were cut short as a scream echoed its way up to the library, the terror-filled sound sending chills up her spine. Eliza quickly jumped to her feet, the book dropping to the ground as she bounded towards the door. She wasn't sure what she was supposed to do about the screaming, but she did know that she wanted it to stop. Her sock-clad feet slid on the marble floor as she tried to follow the echoing sounds of terror to their source. Eliza nearly screamed herself as one of the many maids that inhabited the building came into view, her face bloody and her arm a mangled mess. The maid pressed a finger to her lips and pointed towards her room, the wordless instruction to hide herself cut short as she fell to the ground, the massive blood loss sapping the rest of her strength.

Eliza stepped over the dying maid, her socks soaking up trace amounts of the blood pooling on the ornate floor. She rushed to her room, obedient as she climbed into one of the many closets and hid herself as instructed. She shut and locked the door behind her, her hands searching the walls of the dark, crowded space frantically. Eliza knew there was a security alarm in her closet somewhere, but just where it was she couldn't decide. She silently cursed the large piles of clothes that tripped her up and blocked the path her hands traced, the sounds of breaking glass in the room outside deafening as they fed her fear. Eliza felt a few fear tinted tears roll down her cheeks as she scraped her nails across clothing covered walls, searching desperately for the small control panel that would save her. She heard the doorknob to the closet begin to rattle as she closed her finely manicured nails over the cover of the panel, her fingers trembling as she pried the device open and stabbed at the numbers, the blinking red light that lit up under her hand blinding her momentarily as a shrill siren cut through her eardrums. She heard swearing from just outside the closet door, her spirits lifting as she waited for the siren to alert her dick of a brother and force him to send someone to take care of the problematic people trying to kill her.

A foot slammed into the closet door and she shrank back, worried that the siren hadn't served its purpose in frightening away the vicious person only inches away from grabbing her by the hair and dragging her away or worse. A gruff voice yelled over the siren, the words sending chills down her spine. "I'll be back for ya sweetheart!" Eliza wrapped her arms around her knees and curled in on herself in fear as the heavy footsteps thundered out of the room, her body trembling as she waited for a familiar voice to call out her name in worry.

Reno swore and tried not to rip the nightmarish mission assignment in his clenched hand. Only a true asshole would assign someone the tedious, soul sucking, garishly horrible task of looking after Rufus Shinra's spoiled, snobbish, over dressed nun of a sister. He let his head fall onto the desk, the original thought behind the motion being that if he hit himself hard enough then maybe, just maybe, he would wake up and realize that he had simply had a horrible nightmare. After the first whack he looked at the mission assignment again, Eliza Shinra's face still turning its most likely fake nose up at him from the paper-clipped photograph settled inside the folder. A few sharp cracks to his skull later he stopped looking at the picture and simply continued to pound a dent into his desk, the thudding sound granting him concerned looks from Rude and Elena. Reno felt that maybe, just maybe, if he hit his head hard enough he would knock what was left of his brains out and someone else would be sent to coddle the pampered princess while he tried to shove the substance back into his head.

Elena stood up and slid a box of tissues under his head once the repeated whacks began drawing stares from co-workers who were traversing the halls where the sound echoed. Reno stopped trying to meld his face into the desk when he realized that there was a somewhat soft substance between him and the wood and he threw Elena a glare. "Laney, if ya wanted ta help that would be a box of nails not a box of nose-wipes."

Elena frowned and grabbed the mission assignment from Reno's hand as he shoved the box to the floor. "I figured you would need it once whatever's left of your brain started leaking out your ears. You know what Tseng said about a clean workplace."

Reno rolled his eyes and rubbed his smarting face gingerly. "I've got a few choice words for Tseng when I see him next. What the hell did I do to deserve babysitting duty?"

Rude snorted and hid his face behind his own mission folder as Reno shot a glare at him, silently daring him to laugh again as he watched the bald man's back shake with repressed sniggers. Elena took her turn at an eye roll as she threw the assignment back on his desk, answering his question as if he had been serious. "Remember the caterpillars Reno? Or the snake eggs? How about the superglue? Remember that?"

Reno smiled and leaned back in his desk, his feet landing on the folder he wanted to do horrible things to. "Ah the superglue. You remember the superglue doncha Rude?"

Rude gave a noncommittal grunt as he looked at Elena, her frown enough to keep him from giving a solid answer. Elena flicked her hair back and set her hands on her hips, for a moment resembling the pampered brat Reno was supposed to start guarding that day. "Just do the assignment and stop whining. Maybe you'll get your helicopter privileges back if you keep her from getting killed."

Reno's eyes glimmered at that thought, his helicopter privileges had been revoked shortly after the dreaded superglue incident. He sat up and opened the folder again, shuddering when the beautiful, pampered blonde practically sneered up at him again. He looked up and had a momentary battle in his mind as he tried to decide which beautiful sneering blonde he would prefer to spend time with, Elena or Eliza. It was truly a tough choice, but since Elena could rat him out to Tseng for procrastinating his duties he sided with the over-dressed snob. Reno closed the folder and stood with a dejected sigh, his footsteps heavy as he trudged to the President's office to pick up his charge for the next few weeks. "See ya when I get kicked off the case Rude. Save me a beer or two would ya?" Rude gave a nod and Reno smirked as he shut the door behind him to begin the aggravatingly long walk up to President Shinra's office, his elevator privileges having been revoked after the caterpillar incident.


	2. Chapter 2

Eliza wrapped her arms around her knees as she sat in a high backed leather chair in her brother's far too large office. She shivered with fear that still held her in its firm grasp and tried to steady her frantically beating heart. Even though the danger wasn't present and she was surrounded by people paid to put their lives on the line to protect her, she was still afraid. Her assailants parting words still echoed in her mind and she hid her face in her knees, pressing her eyes into her jeans to try and hold their lids shut tight so that the tears she had stopped crying earlier wouldn't resume carving paths through her makeup.

Rufus had sent for her the second the news of the attack reached his ears. All of the injured had been given medical attention and had then been detained for questioning. The dead were sitting in the Midgar morgue and would have every aspect of their funerals paid for. The second Eliza had been brought into his office he had simply told her to sit and stop crying. As she looked up at him through still watery eyes she felt an intense loathing swim through her veins. He seemed to care more about the well-being of the help than his own sister.

Rufus could feel Eliza's hateful gaze and he didn't blame her for it. He didn't have time to worry about her well-being when she was obviously physically sound and he doubted he would have cared much more if she had been injured. With all the paperwork he had he couldn't spare any time for her and quite frankly, he didn't want to. She was the only person involved in the incident that was graced with his presence and if she couldn't appreciate that then he had nothing to say to her. He barely even acknowledged her presence as he filled out his paperwork, knowing that she would hate him more the second she saw who he had assigned to look after her.

Eliza settled her face back against her knees, unable to look at Rufus any longer. Her chair squeaked when she moved, she was afraid to touch the floor with her bloodstained socks, her makeup was sliding down her face, her nails were chipped, her stomach was empty, her throat was parched, and her hair was an absolute mess. She was cold, tired, and uncomfortable. Her first desire was to go home, but she knew she wasn't safe there. The knowledge that she wasn't safe within the walls of her own home made her head swim and she almost began hyperventilating with fear and helplessness as a terrifying thought crossed her mind. What if she wasn't safe anywhere?

Reno climbed the last flight of stairs and stopped at the landing, huffing and puffing as his smoke scarred lungs struggled to keep up with his demand for oxygen. He had started the stairs at a solid sprint, hoping that the quicker he went the longer it would take him to tire out. As usual his hopes went unanswered and now he stared at the dingy ceiling of the rarely used stairwell and panted, his limbs trembling and his lungs aching. He cursed whatever movie, song, god, or alcoholic beverage had convinced him that filling an elevator shaft with caterpillars had been a good idea. At the time it sounded so entertaining; a million creepy crawly critters let loose in the Shinra building to wreak havoc on all squeamish individuals stupid or lazy enough to ride the elevator. Now it just sounded stupid. How could he have forgotten that an elevator full of soft and squishy caterpillars would eventually get squished by the not so squishy elevator? No matter how much he cursed himself and every other thing he could think of he remembered the incident with fondness.

Reno finally managed to catch his breath and stood, shakily dusting himself off and walking towards Rufus' office. He still clutched the dreaded mission assignment in his hand and he hoped that he could convince Rufus to assign his bratty sister to someone else for safe-keeping.

Reno sighed at the large group of Soldiers loitering by Rufus' doorway. It was a sure sign that the bitch he wanted to avoid was nestled safely inside and waiting for him to escort her back home. He had a feeling the Soldiers would be accompanying them too. It wasn't something he wanted to think about, sharing breathing space with a spoiled rich girl would be bad enough, but adding thick-headed Soldiers to the mix was just extra punishment. He had to wonder if Rufus was still angry at him for the bacon incident.

Reno quickly flashed his ID at the Soldiers that loosely guarded the doorway and, after a few second and third glances from almost every Soldier present and a request for further identification later; he was allowed to step inside Rufus' roomy office. At first glance he couldn't see Eliza and his heart soared with the hope that he would be able to request a different assignment without offending his probable charge. As he neared the desk his heart, and face, fell as a head full of long blonde hair came into view behind one of the chairs.

Eliza squeezed into a tighter ball as the door opened, paranoia addling her senses and putting her on high alert. She chastised herself as her heart pounded uncontrollably, annoyed that she was unable to keep herself from overreacting. She wiped her face shakily and looked to her right as the seat beside her squeaked noisily.

Eliza blinked hard, thinking that maybe she was so tired that her eyes had started playing tricks on her. The man sitting beside her was disheveled, sweaty, and reeked of stale cigarettes. He seemed to regard Rufus as an equal though because he tossed a file onto his desk and then propped his feet up on it. His face was full of frustration and she was having a hard time deciding if the lines under his eyes were stray strands of his obviously unruly hair or if they were tattoos. She didn't know which she would prefer. He looked tired, his bright blue-green eyes framed by dark circles.

Reno frowned at Rufus, trying to put as much of his anger in his face as he could so that his words would sound neutral. "What is this about?"

Rufus frowned at the dirty boots flecking debris on his pristine desk. He learned long ago that nothing short of injury or death would keep Reno's feet on the floor where they belonged. "You read the report. You know why you're here."

Eliza blinked at the red-headed man's obviously angry expression and watched the ensuing verbal battle with wide eyes.

"But why am I here?"

"You read the report?"

"Yeah."

"Then you should know."

"Yeah, but why am I here?"

"I thought you said you read the report!"

"I did!"

"Then why do you keep asking why you're here?"

"Because I wanna know!"

Rufus slapped a hand to his face and inhaled deeply. "Rephrase the question Reno."

Reno rolled his eyes and searched for different words. "Why did you assign the mission to me?"

Rufus sighed and straightened, pushing Reno's disgustingly filthy shoes off of his desk. "Because I can."

Reno's chair toppled over and he flopped onto the floor with a growl. "I don't want to do it!"

Rufus frowned, "Do you want to get paid?"

Reno opened his mouth to retort that no, he would not like to get paid, but his previous experience with saying that always left his paycheck a little light.

Eliza giggled as the red-head gaped like a fish out of water, at a loss for words. The glare he shot at her was enough to make her quiet and look away, ashamed even though she couldn't think of anything she had done wrong. She hastily wiped her face on her jeans, smearing her makeup further.

Rufus grinned and sneered down at his subordinate. "Any more questions Reno?"

Reno turned his glare on Rufus who was disappointingly unaffected by it. "No sir."

Rufus sat back in his chair and continued filing his paperwork. "Then you can go. Take Eliza home and keep her safe. Take those idiot Soldiers by the door with you, they're driving me insane."

Reno sighed and stood up, brushing off his pants and heading for the door. "Come on Lizzie time to get yer pampered ass back home."

Eliza gaped at Reno as he walked away, so utterly offended that she couldn't respond. She looked at Rufus as he continued filling out his papers, a small smile on his face as he acted like he was completely oblivious to the situation. Eliza frowned and got up, deciding that it would be better to spend time with someone who she barely knew than with a brother she knew all too well. Even if Reno hated her he had to be more interesting company than Rufus.

**Vietta's Author's Note: I am SO sorry we didn't get this chapter done sooner guys! We have been pretty busy with our own stories and this got set on a back burner. Hopefully we'll get our next couple chapters up sooner.**


	3. Chapter 3

Reno snatched the Soldier's by Rufus' door from their posts and barked orders for a limo stocked to the top with alcohol and an elevator key so he didn't have to run back down all the hundreds of millions of stairs that seemed to stretch like an unruly behemoth between the top floor and the bottom floor. The Soldier's snapped to it and Reno was immediately presented with an elevator key, something he was sure Tseng would take from him the second he knew he had it but he was happy to have it anyways. He doubted he would get his wish for alcohol, but there was always some kind of drink at Rufus' mansion so he could wait for it. Eliza was sniffling quietly beside him and he was about four more sniffles away from shoving a Kleenex so deep into her sinuses that she'd never need one again. He _hated_ it when people cried. It drove him nuts. He might get some enjoyment out of making her scream though; he would have to start planning ways to make her upset with him. If she got distraught enough she might force Rufus to assign someone else to her. He was sure Elena would simply cherish the chance to have the brat gloat about all her clothes and make-up and money to her.

Eliza followed Reno quietly, nose in the air. She was under the impression that if she held it up high enough she'd eventually reach air that didn't reek so badly of sweaty old cigarettes. She'd have to carry a can of air-freshener with her while he was in her house if he was going to insist on smoking and sweating so badly. She was going to have to lay down some rules; he was _not_ going to be smoking anywhere near her. Cigarettes killed people and she wasn't going to die because he was an addict.

Reno slipped into the limo and immediately began rifling through the mini-fridge in the back. Lo and behold, wine coolers. Wine coolers weren't his first choice for an alcoholic beverage, but in a pinch they would do. Eliza stepped into the limo after him and shut the door daintily and he rolled his eyes as he twisted off the top of his wine cooler. The Soldier's that were supposed to accompany them would meet them at the house with reinforcements, until then the blonde was, unfortunately, solely his responsibility. "Hey driver, stop by my place first I've gotta get some clothes if I'm gonna be stayin' with the brat for the next couple weeks."

Eliza decided to ignore his comment and let the driver change directions without commentary. She didn't need to give the red-head more incentive to insult her; he had obviously been prejudiced against her by the tabloids that slandered her. She watched as the red-head downed his wine cooler after giving the driver directions to his home, noting the time of day with disgust. She had barely noticed the change from night to day, but as she looked at her very expensive and very precise wristwatch, she realized that she had spent the entire night crying in Rufus' office while he did paperwork and cleaned up the mess. She didn't take the time to recognize that her brother had sacrificed sleep to stay with her, he could have easily delegated the clean-up process to someone else and gone home, but he hadn't. He had apparently been working late anyways, but he still could have given up on her and gone home hours before. She was too offended by Reno's drinking at seven in the morning to be concerned with a show of graciousness from her aloof brother. "You do realize what time it is, don't you?"

"Nope. Don't care either." Reno sucked down wine coolers happily, letting the alcohol warm him. He hated Midgar winters, they were always ridiculously cold. He supposed that that was because it was winter and winter was meant to be cold, but he still wasn't going to be happy about it. Nature pissed him off sometimes; why couldn't it just be summer all year long?

"It's seven in the morning and you're drinking already?" Eliza frowned and glared at him, eyes still red from crying. She hated alcoholics. Her father had been one and Rufus was turning into one as well. Every time she saw him now there was a glass of amber colored liquid within easy reach of his hands.

Reno sighed and rubbed his face wearily. He was going to have to lay down the law with the bitch before she got the thought in her head that he was supposed to do what she said. "Listen, Lizzie, I don't give a damn what time it is I will do what I want when I want and not give a shit about what you think. If you've got somethin' ta say about it go ahead but don't expect me to listen, care, or do a damn thing you say." The limo stopped and Reno nearly shouted praise to the gods as he was given an excuse to leave Eliza's company.

Eliza fumed as Reno hopped out of the limo and rushed into the building they had stopped at, head bowed against the snow-strewn, frigid wind. She would not tolerate someone so crass and crude thinking he was in charge of her. She was Eliza Shinra and she deserved to be treated with respect. She hadn't done anything to earn the respect she thought she deserved, but that didn't deter her from demanding it.

Reno grabbed a rarely used duffel bag out of his closet and started packing it with clothes and other necessities. He hated the fact that he wouldn't be able to sleep somewhere familiar, he could never fall asleep when he wasn't acquainted with the place he was staying at. A touch of familiarity would allow him to sleep and, as he looked around deciding just what it was he should take, might possibly get him fired. The answer to his question caught his eye as his pet iguana, Trevor, walked into the room. Trevor was just as alcoholic as his owner, something that disgusted Elena and just about everyone else who had been to his house, but Reno didn't care. He loved his iguana, no matter how often it bit him or scratched him or ignored him. He gathered up Trevor's things, his cage, his food, and finally Trevor himself, and then grabbed his duffel bag. Eliza would most likely refuse to allow the iguana to stay, but Reno knew how to convince her. He cackled madly as he walked outside with Trevor under one arm and his things under the other arm, ignoring the bites the iguana laid on his hand.

Eliza shrieked when Reno re-entered the car, laying the iguana on the seat beside her. The iguana was green, scaly, and the second most unwelcome thing that had entered her car. Reno shoved his things into the car and slammed the door shut behind him, a wide, smug grin plastered on his face as he ordered the driver to go to her house. As the car took off Eliza panicked, scooting as far away form the lizard beside her as she could. "You're not bringing that thing!"

Reno frowned at her and stroked Trevor's back, something the iguana didn't seem to mind too badly. "Yes I am. He's my pet and I'm not gonna leave him to starve to death. Its cruel and its not gonna happen."

"Don't you have someone else who can take care of him? What do you do with him when you go on missions!" Eliza shuddered as the iguana looked at her, pressing against the door.

"I usually leave Trevor with a kennel place but it's easier if he can come with me. Kennels are horrible. They keep him in a cage to sit and wallow in his own poop and I'm not gonna let him live like that for weeks if it can be avoided so just sit back, shut up, and learn to like him." Reno sipped at his wine cooler happily and watched Eliza squirm.

Eliza kept as far from the iguana as she could during the ride home and the iguana didn't seem to care about her one bit. It was too busy biting at Reno's hand to notice her. Eliza took it as proof of how horrible Reno was when his own pet didn't want to have him touching it. Reno seemed devoted to the creature, however, and she couldn't say no to the pet when she thought about the conditions it would be put under in a kennel. Perhaps the iguana would keep Reno out of her hair. If it pooped all over her house she was going to have a fit; the maids didn't deserve the demeaning task of cleaning up iguana shit stains. "You're going to clean up after it."

Reno rolled his eyes and set Trevor on his shoulder, grabbing his things as the car stopped. "Course I am. He's mine. I take care of my stuff...well, at least the stuff that eats and breathes and shit like that." He stepped out of the limo and into the expansive garage the limo had parked in. He wasn't surprised to see so many expensive cars parked around, Rufus Shinra and his father had a thing for cars that made three miles to the gallon and went from zero to one hundred in six point seven seconds. Reno purposefully smudged his finger across the hood of one of the cars as he followed Eliza into the mansion, noting the dust that built up on the pad of his finger with amusement. Rufus might buy fancy cars, but that didn't mean he ever drove them. It was a shame really, but Reno could care less what Rufus wasted his money on. So long as Reno got paid he could care less.

Eliza rushed into the house as quickly as possible; brushing past the Soldier's stationed at the door. She knew she was safe now and she allowed her normal demeanor to shine through in all its haughty smugness. Reno followed her in and started talking to the Soldier's losing her interest as quickly as the bit of humanity his iguana made him show had gathered it. She needed a bath and fresh clothes and warm food and she needed them as soon as possible. She was starving and looked like a disaster. As she began climbing the stairs to her room, Reno stopped her with a short whistle. "Hey, Lizzie! Not so fast we've gotta set some ground rules."

"It can wait until after I get cleaned up." Eliza started back up the stairs again and Reno whistled once more, making her frown and turn back around. "If you keep whistling at me like a dog, I'm going to have you fired!"

"The coke-whore look suits you and you respond better when I treat you like a dog." Reno set Trevor on the floor and let him run off to explore his new tromping ground, knowing that there wouldn't be any cats or dogs around to harm his surprisingly vulnerable little biter. Rufus wouldn't allow any other pets beside Dark Nation to stay in his mansion and the guard hound never left his side so Reno had nothing to worry about. "Don't bother trying to get me fired; Rufus sent me here to keep you in line and giving you hell is part of the job description."

"You were sent here to protect me, not order me around and be my nanny!" Eliza filed the coke-whore comment away for further study, she wasn't quite sure what a proper response to that would be but she would think one up. Reno didn't look like he was afraid of recycling insults and he would probably use that one again.

Reno plopped onto the couch and patted the seat cushion next to him. "Shut the hell up and sit down or I'm going to assign all the rules myself and you'll stay locked in your room for the next few weeks. I may even be generous enough to have a cat door installed so we can pass food in for you."

Eliza frowned and sat on a chair across from him, determined to stay out of his reach. "You're an asshole."

"And you're a bitch. Now that we've got that bit established, let's talk rules." Reno threw his arm over the back of the couch and tossed one of his legs onto the cushions, allowing himself to get comfortable.

"My house, my rules!" Eliza crossed her arms over her chest and slipped one leg over the other, making sure her body language made her as closed off as possible. Reno might be an open book, but she would be as enigmatic as possible.

"Yeah, right." Reno snorted, noting the blood on the bottom of Eliza's socks with curiosity. "Whose blood did ya tramp in?"

"One of the maids." Eliza shuddered at the reminder of the night before, remembering why Reno was in her home in the first place. _I'll be back for ya, sweetheart! _Eliza shuddered and pulled her arms closer to her chest.

Reno nodded and ran a hand through his hair. "So here are the first couple rules; if you hurt Trevor, I hurt you; if you try to boss me around, I'll lock you in your room; if you so much as _look_ outside without my permission, I'll cuff you to your bed and you won't see sunshine for a week. Any questions?"

Eliza frowned, "You can't lock me in my room!"

"Wanna test that theory?" Reno raised an eyebrow at her, his voice threateningly calm.

Eliza opened her mouth to retort and then shook her head, sighing softly. "No."

"Good. Go clean the make-up off your face you look like a whore-clown." Reno grabbed a remote from the coffee table between them and started pressing buttons, trying to figure out where the television was and what he would have to do to find his favorite channels.

Eliza stood up and stomped to her room irritably, wishing she had a better response to his insults. None of her books had taught her the proper way to deal with an uncouth jerk like Reno, but she would figure it out. She did have a computer and she was pretty sure there would be a website out there somewhere with retorts she could put to good use on the wily red-head. She jumped and screamed as the iguana walked past her down the stairs, ignoring her girlishness as he slowly moved to see Reno. Eliza frowned as she heard Reno laugh from the bottom of the stairs, his EMR quickly tucked back inside his jacket. "You are such a pansy!" She turned on her heel and stomped up the rest of the stairs, determined to find a way to wipe the smug smile off his face.

Reno scooped up Trevor and set him on his shoulder, frowning as he tried to lower his adrenalin output. Even if he was having the time of his life busting Eliza's chops, he was on guard duty first and foremost and if anything happened to her he would find the working end of a gun at the back of his head. He decided to give up on watching television; he couldn't find the damn thing even though he could hear it behind one of the walls. He could always try again later, but for now he decided he should probably take a look around the manor and figure out where any weak spots were in the defenses they had set up. If people could get in once they could probably get in twice and Reno was supposed to be there to stop them and there was always the chance he would find some alcohol during his peek around the house. "You look like you could use a drink, Trevor." Trevor stopped biting his hair, a sure sign that he approved of the idea. Reno chuckled and walked around the mansion happily, enjoying what could possibly be the last moments of peace he would get during his stay.

**Vietta's Author's Note: So sorry this has taken so long! Hopefully it's good enough to make up for the wait. Now that I'm not so far behind with my own stories it will be MUCH easier to update this one. We've got lots planned for you, dear readers, prepare yourselves!**


	4. Chapter 4

Eliza sighed in relief as she toweled dry, the grime from last nights ordeal stripped from her body by a pumice stone coated in perfumed shower gels and scalding hot water. She felt refreshed and, as she watched the last of the steamy water get soaked into the towel, much less concerned by her body guard's unfortunate identity. She didn't take the time to notice that the broken window from the night before had already been replaced and the few objects that had been stolen from her had been given the same treatment. Her room was as it always had been, filled with things she didn't want or couldn't use; but perhaps it should have bothered her that everything, including the maid who had used the last of her strength to warn her to safety, had already been replaced in the short span of a few hours. Instead she busied herself with the now and felt that her hands were too full trying to deal with Reno and his hideous iguana for her to spend much time worrying about real problems. She had thought up a few retorts for the pesky red-head's insults that she would try out the next time he tried to verbally back-hand her, but for now she simply wanted to avoid the clown. He and his iguana would cause her more stress than she could handle and she knew it. However, she didn't want to stay cooped up in her spacious room where there was nothing to do, despite the television, stereo system, computer, and multiple gaming systems that were all gathering dust in their given spaces in a wooden entertainment center that had likely not been opened at any point in the last year, they had not even been opened by the crooks the night before who could have made lucrative profit by selling the various technologies. Perhaps a dusty wooden cabinet was the best way to deter theft.

Eliza searched through the many clothes in her closet and pulled out her favorite bikini, one of two that she actually wore despite the fact that she had lost count of how many she had stockpiled in her filled to the brim closet. She slipped it on, hoping that the pesky red-head had no desire to use the pool. All Eliza wanted to do was float around on a pool mat and possibly do a few dives off of the diving board and she didn't want an audience of one to scoff at her while she did it.

Eliza peered out of her room, towel wrapped around her chest and held tightly closed. She wasn't ashamed of her body in any way, in fact she was proud that she was able to look beautiful without any of the cosmetic surgeries that the tabloids and magazines accused her of scandalously getting, but if the red-head turned out to be a pervert she wanted to have something to hide behind. She slipped down the stairs, her bare feet making light slapping noises against the marble flooring. Reno had left the living room, obviously unable to figure out how the television worked. Eliza scoffed at him in her head and turned the television off, noting that Reno had missed the button specifically labeled for opening the wall up to reveal the television. She walked down the hall, refusing to note that the broken windows that had lined the wall had already been replaced and the glass that had littered the floor had been cleaned up without leaving the smallest scratch on the marble to show that there had been any damage done to the mansion at all. Any ripped painting had been removed and replaced with and exact replica and broken vases had simply been discarded and new sculptures or flower arrangements replaced them.

Eliza peered into the pool room, groaning in disbelief as she saw the iguana sprawled by the side of the pool, its eyes closed as it basked in the luxury of the heated tile floor. The pool room itself had been the site of a drowning the night before, a butler had managed to catch one of the crooks unawares and had done him in, giving the Turks and Soldiers investigating the break in one of their only clues to who the men who had attacked were, but the pool room itself had no more evidence to give as everything had been cleaned and the corpse had been removed. Everything had been scoured and repaired and, had Eliza thought about it enough to realize it, the pool water had probably been drained and replaced earlier that morning. Of course, it was almost not morning now, the pool clock on the wall told Eliza she had spent more than an hour scrubbing away the evidence of last night from her thin frame. As she took a moment to think on the fact, now that she had been cleaned all evidence of the night before had been totally removed from the mansion, if not from the face of the Planet entirely. The only evidence of the ordeal was locked in filing cabinets at the Shinra building and inside the minds of those who had been involved in the instance.

Eliza took a quick look around the pool room, deciding it was free of red-heads and that it might be safe to enter. She went to her pool chair and set her towel on it, firmly believing that if she left the iguana alone, it would leave her alone. However, Trevor considered her a trespasser and he didn't take kindly to trespassers. He gave her an evil stare as she pulled her pool mat out of the storage closet that held more pool toys and gear than any one person could ever need or use at once. Eliza shuddered and gave Trevor a glance, shrieking as he ran towards her and jumping into the pool, mat thrown under her to keep her from submerging without being prepared for it. She got herself situated on the pool mat and floated away from the irritable and disgusting iguana, frowning as it hissed at her. She stuck her tongue out at it and tried to regain control over her racing heart, wishing she had had time to turn the stereo system on so she could have at least put some music on to relax to.

Reno rushed in, EMR drawn and eyes wild. After a quick look around the room, he turned his angry eyes to Eliza, voice gravelly and rough. "What the fuck did you scream for!"

"That thing tried to attack me!" Eliza protested, pointing at Trevor accusingly as the iguana snagged one of Reno's toes in its scaly maw.

"Trevor doesn't have teeth what the fuck are you scared of!" Reno frowned and shook Trevor off of his toe. "He can pinch hard but damn, you screamed like someone was coming at you with a knife!"

Eliza frowned and crossed her arms over her chest. "I want it out of here! Besides, if he drinks the chlorine water he'll die."

"Babe, he's had worse to drink." Reno rolled his eyes and picked the squirming iguana up, setting him outside the door and giving his hindquarters a gentle slap. "Get your fat ass somewhere else. You're scaring the brat."

Trevor hissed and ran off, scaly legs gyrating in a comical fashion.

Reno turned back to Eliza, jabbing his EMR at her and holding up four fingers. "Rule number four; no fucking screaming unless someone is killing you. Got it?"

"Why the hell do you get to set all the rules!" Eliza frowned and sat up, surprised at her own boldness.

"Because you haven't spoken up yet, bimbo, and Ruffie left my happy-dandy ass in charge so you're going to have to follow my rules and like it, got it?" Reno frowned and collapsed his EMR, tucking it into one of his many pockets.

"I don't give two shits what Rufus did! I will not be treated like a child! Rule number five; you make one more rule and I'll toss every bottle of alcohol in this house down the drain and watch you go through withdrawal!" Eliza held up five fingers, her voice cracking at the level of force she put behind it. Eliza wasn't a yeller, at least not when she was angry. However, Reno had pushed more than one of her buttons in the last five minutes and apparently the combination he used set her off.

Reno frowned and crossed his arms over his chest. "I move for an amendment to your rule."

"What?" Eliza had expected outright protest, what was Reno talking about, amendments?

"I want to amend your rule. I want the word unnecessary to be put in before rule." Reno watched Eliza float across the pool, her face drawn tight with anger and her eyes shinning confusion. He had to admit, as much as he loathed her, she was cute when she was mad.

"So, now rule five is 'if you make one more unnecessary rule I get to toss all the alcohol down the drain and watch you go through withdrawal'?" Eliza raised an eyebrow, still mad but able to accept the change to the rule, after all, Reno may need to make actual rules later on to keep her safe.

"Exactly. Just so we can have a few serious rules made eventually without you tossing out all the booze." Reno looked around the pool room, staring at the piles of pool toys Eliza had accidentally knocked out of the closet.

"Okay, I can handle that." Eliza lay back on her pool mat, her anger ebbing as she floated around.

"Good." Reno started sifting through the pool toys, grinning. He hadn't been in a pool in years and he was going to jump on the chance to use Eliza's whenever he got it. He figured if she was in here, he was simply doing his duty as her guard to be in the pool too. "I'll be back, stay."

"Sure." Eliza sighed, not liking that Reno gave her commands like she was a dog. Reno rushed out of the room and Eliza lay back against the mat, closing her eyes and sincerely hoping that the pest didn't come back.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note: Trevor you brute! It must be because Reno still hasn't found him that drink…<strong>


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